Rambo Mommy
Okay, so last night was Blaise's end of year second grade concert.
I was just going to take him, because Jason and I are lazy parents and we don't enjoy taking
Avery to outings like that. But Blaise wanted us BOTH there, so we complied.
So we get there and find our seats and Avery was pretty good until close to the end. Then she decided that she wanted to go up on stage with brother and dance. Sure it could have been cute, but it turned very ugly, very fast.
The following is Jason's version of the Second Grade Choir Concert.
Oh ya- you have to read the caption in the "movie guy" voice, or it won't make sense, it won't be funny, and then I will just feel stupid!
REMEMBER TO READ IT IN THE MOVIE GUY VOICE!!!
........................................................................................................................................................................In a school full
of uncertainty,
overtaken by zombie
parents and crazy possessed
school children,
One mother bravely
defies all odds to
save her daughter
from what could have been.
(insert slow motion running into battle war cry.)
RAAAAAAAAWWWWWW!
Coming to a
theater near year.
RAMBO MOMMY
Summer of 2009
of uncertainty,
overtaken by zombie
parents and crazy possessed
school children,
One mother bravely
defies all odds to
save her daughter
from what could have been.
(insert slow motion running into battle war cry.)
RAAAAAAAAWWWWWW!
Coming to a
theater near year.
RAMBO MOMMYSummer of 2009
Now maybe this isn't very funny to you, but let me tell ya, when I got back to my seat, Jason was BUSTING A GUT laughing at the pictures he took. He said it looked like a scene from Rambo, and I was just missing my sweat band tied around my head, and maybe a few more muscles.
Why was Avery screaming when I was just trying to save her? I don't know.
Why was I running like there was bombs and enemy attacks going on right behind me? I don't know!
Why did Jason think to take pictures of me running my daughter to safety?
I will NEVER know.
But he did, and he thought it was H.I.L.A.R.I.O.U.S. and he wanted me to blog it.
THE END.
Why was Avery screaming when I was just trying to save her? I don't know.
Why was I running like there was bombs and enemy attacks going on right behind me? I don't know!
Why did Jason think to take pictures of me running my daughter to safety?
I will NEVER know.
But he did, and he thought it was H.I.L.A.R.I.O.U.S. and he wanted me to blog it.
THE END.
13 comments:
That is GREAT!!!!! It would have benn funny by itself, but with "movie guy" narrating and the FABULOUS pictures......it makes it THAT much better!!!!!!!! Thanks Jason!
This is possibly my favorite post yet. I made Nate read it. I would pay good money to see Rambo Mommy.
Okay, this cracks me up for so many reasons.
First off, "movie guy" narration is genius.
Second, I love the shot of you running with Ava and then the close up of it. I totally get a slow motion picture in my head like you guys are running away from an explosion or something. I'm sure you're probably saying "shhh" but in the whole scheme of things it totally looks like you're yelling "nooo" (again, I'm picturing it in deep, slow motion voice) right before you hit the ground to shelter your daughter from the afore mentioned explosion.
Third, I think it's HILARIOUS that Jason thought to take pictures of his wife trying to gracefully calm your kicking & screaming daughter down without causing even more of a scene.
Fourth, some of the kids in the background are so funny. Most of them are staring at you wide-eyed. Then there's one little girl in the front on the left wih her hand cupped over her mouth giggling. And another little girl on the top left is whispering to her oblivious friend. I'm sure she's saying something like "hey, you gotta check this lady out!".
Fifth, you can totally tell you're bookin' it because your hair is blowing in the wind. And I highly doubt there was a fan on you since, after all, this is just a make believe movie in all of our silly little heads.
Thanks for the movie visual. This was very entertaining and since we don't have tv I needed some amusement.
HILARIOUS ! ! ! I CAN SO SEE THIS WHOLE THING PLAY OUT PERFECTLY IN MY MIND WITH "MOVIE GUY" VOICE SURROUND SOUND IN MY EARS. I LAUGHED SO HARD I ALMOST PEED MY PANTS. OK, SO THOSE LATE NIGHT BRAINSTORMS FOR MOVIE IDEAS HAS REALLY PAID OFF FOR YOU GUYS. I THINK THIS ONE IS YOUR BEST WORK TO DATE, I THINK IT WOULD BE A HUGE SUCCESS!!! CAN YOU SAY BLOCKBUSTER! I WANT TO BE THE FIRST TO BUY ADVANCED TICKETS. YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME. WHAT MAKES THIS EVEN MORE AMUSING IS I KNOW, AND I CAN VISUALIZE YOU DOING ALL OF THIS IN HEELS, (NEEDLESS TO SAY). BY THE WAY PRETTY NICE GUNS THERE RAMBO MOMMY. I SERIOUSLY CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEQUEL.
Jared laughed so hard when he saw this. He thinks that we'll all eventually end up seeing you on America's Funniest Home Videos because there's a guy in the audience video recording the whole thing! If he ends up winning, which how could he not, then you need to fight for your share.
I've got to agree. Hilarious!!!
That is GREAT! Love the picture and description. Thanks for making me laugh!
Too funny! I also spit my drink out at that picture. PRICELESS! She was really upset!
Ha Ha Ha! How funny. I guess now we all know why you usually don't take Avery to those sorts of things.
Thats pretty funny! I like the whole movie guy narration, made it perfect
Those picture ARE hilarious! And maybe just slightly embarassing that you had to deal with a screamer in the middle of a lovely concert.
oh wow...this is just what I needed to brighten my rainy day morning lol thanks! : )
I found you from Kathy at Mama's Losin' It and can I tell you I AM CRYING? I am laughing so darn hard I am crying.
And the mother of year award goes to...HEATHER!
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