I think I need to clarify..........
So this weekend...............I told Jason I wanted to do something fun on Saturday. I needed to do something fun, something different, ................we needed to have fun!
We built a snowman!
Next time I guess I need to clarify better!
There are a few other things I need to clarify better too.
* When I say I feel fat and ugly, it does not mean I need advice on how to NOT feel that way, for example
Me: "I feel fat and ugly today."
You: "Did you workout today?"
Ummmmmmmmm........ya, so to clarify.............when I say I feel fat and ugly, you say, "What!? I was just going to say how HOT you look today. I LOVE those jeans on you! Where did you get them? You always look SO much better than I do!"
* When I say I'm sick of cleaning the house all day, everyday, I don't really mean I'm sick and I need medicine or something. That means I need help cleaning this house so I don't HAVE to do it everyday, all day. I don't know, maybe hire me a maid, so I can do better things with my time,............ like figuring out a way to shut Sean Penn up!
* When I'm having a conversation with a friend and she goes on and on and on about how perfect her life is, and I say "Yeah, good for you! I'm so jealous!" and clap my hands and jump up and down...........Ya, ...........that doesn't mean I am jealous! That means I'm bored of this and I would rather be talking about me.
* When I say clean your room, well................that means clean your room!!! Not push everything to one side of the room so more of the floor is showing than 10 minutes before!
* When I say I need a break, that doesn't mean a quick trip to Albertson's, by myself, to get toilet paper. That means I need a massage and a pedicure followed by shopping for new shoes. And maybe a dinner date, but I don't want to push it.
* The words "I'm just saying" and "just kidding" don't really mean that. That means, I just said something rude, but if I say that at the end of it, I can get away with it.......................wait, ..........maybe I shouldn't have told you that one!
* When I say I have the cutest kids, I mean that. I don't mean for you to say "ya, with the exception of mine!......just kidding" I know what the JUST KIDDING means!!!
* When I say I don' feel like cooking dinner, that doesn't mean I want to rummage through what we have on hand and just make do eating cereal or canned soup!! That means, I want Cafe Rio. I want YOU to go get me Cafe Rio. And bring the kids, so I can take a bath. But don't take too long. I don't want to get all prunish.
* When I say nothing is wrong. That means something is wrong, and you are just too lame because you can't figure it out, so you don't deserve me telling you what's wrong. If nothings REALLY wrong, then I will say nothing and then ask why? A plain "nothing" is ALWAYS something!
* When I say I want to do something fun on Saturday, ...........that means I want to go shopping!
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Do you have anything that needs to be clarified?
8 comments:
i just want to say AMEN to all of these...every single one of them!! :) found you from Mama Kat's blog awhile back ago & have never left a comment before, but i love reading!! :)
Let me just say, I like it, I wish all humans came with a direct "key guide". It would make things so much easier.
Then I wouldn't have to waste my precious time trying to figure out what it is they want from me. :}
Were you at my house this morning? Because I had those exact same conversations this morning. Holy cow!
I suppose everything gets better....
=)
I HATE when people say, "I'm just saying." I heard you. I know what you just said.
i love this, so true and so funny!! great work, i need to print out a copy for chris!
HAHA! Thanks for clarifying.
And, I love how vibrant the colors are in your outside snow pictures.
I am with you! This was such a funny post.
love this! ima staple it to my hubby's forehead...
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