I will be patient.

Lately I have been trying to figure things out.

You know, looking out the window, wondering "who am I?" "where am I going?" "what do I want out of life?"

I know I am so blessed. Even in times of trials, I have a pretty good habit of looking on the bright side. I was raised that way I guess. Sure, I have BAD days, when nothing seems to go right, and I feel like I can't take it anymore, but for the most part, I am a "make lemonade" type of girl.

It's become quite handy, because we get a lot of curve balls thrown our way. We usually can't hit them out of the park, but we still try. Isn't that the point?

I have been talking with a lot of my friends lately, and it seems like everyone, including me, are going through some life speed bumps.

I was talking with one friend in particular and she is going through a lot of huge things. I haven't seen or talked with this friend in over 10 years. We sat one day and played catch up. We talked for hours. She told me about everything she is going through right now and I was almost surprised with her honesty and her bravery. She didn't hold anything back. She didn't try to gloss over things, she didn't try to paint a pretty picture, she was real and it was so refreshing. She wasn't complaining about anything, she was just telling me how it was, and wasn't worried about what it made her look like. She told me that she could do that because she knew that I KNEW her, and that I wouldn't judge her or think anything of her, just because life is throwing her some curve balls right now. It doesn't mean she is stupid, it doesn't mean she has made wrong decisions, it doesn't mean that she doesn't try, or that she isn't as good as someone else, she is just having to deal with things right now, that's all it is. Nothing more, nothing less. It's just life.

I was so impressed by her. We sat there and cried, and laughed, and we prayed. I caught her up on my life too, the ups and the downs. We tried to help each other, but there wasn't much either of us could do for the other, except for listen, love, and hug.

I have thought a lot about our talk since we've had it. She was so upbeat about everything. She knew that her life was less than perfect right now, but she knew that it wouldn't stay that way. She was hopeful. She told me that her Bishop told her that "you can not make a wrong decision or go down the wrong path if you go with the Lord." I found so much comfort in that, and I know that is why she can keep going. She doesn't know where life will take her, or how it will end up, but she know's that as long as she takes everything to the Lord, she can not go wrong. Even if right now she doesn't understand, she knows that she can't go wrong. How awesome is that!?

The other day I was reading and I found this paragraph that I LOVED!!! I think it has a lot to do with what we were talking about the other day. The chapter started out telling the story about a little pioneer girl. She was on one of the handcart trails and her family had passed away on the journey. She was cold and tired and she couldn't figure out why no one was offering her a ride. Finally a man drove up next to her and offered her a ride. She was so relieved. So as she tried to get on the cart, the man had his horses go faster, and he made her run along side to try to catch up. She couldn't understand why he was being so cruel. Then, after what seemed to be forever, he stopped, and bundled her up in a blanket and put her in the cart. She later learned that he made her run so that she would not freeze to death in the cart, that her body heat would keep her warm while she slept. Then this was the next paragraph:

"I have wondered if when we have given all we have to give, relying on the promise that the Lord will lift us up, when we are questioning why he doesn't pull us into the wagon, when we are about to collapse from the sheer exhaustion of it all - what if we stopped and listened to the Spirit? Perhaps we might hear him saying, "Wait. Wait just a little longer. You don't know what I'm trying to save here." Maybe the message would even be, "You don't know who I'm trying to save here. You don't know whose life might be eternally affected by your willingness to hang on for one more moment, to keep taking step after step. I promise I won't leave you a drop. I know what you can bear, and your trials will not exceed your capacity." - Emily Watts

I will keep waiting.